Tuesday, September 30, 2008

I'm so freaking depressed

Exactly one month ago...

Yes, the post Mission KK depression hasn't quite left me yet ;'(
*or isit my PMS, hmm...*


I have visited so many dentists lately, it's not funny. I told myself that if i can conquer KK, visiting the dentist should be chicken shit. But i'm feeling otherwise.

While i thought i have found "the" doctor to get my wisdom tooth surgery done, that dude cabut from Sim&Hooi without notice and they had to refer me to another doctor. So, dad recommended me his golfer friend's son who's clinic is super nearby my home, but that dude was so freaking expensive and unhygienic.

So i was again recommended by some friends to another doctor who's very well known but hard to book cause he's too freaking good and well known. I finally got to meet him- Dr.Wong, last weekend after ALOT of waiting and he is the only doc that has quoted me a HUMANE price. Even so, it would cost me RM600 per tooth. So after much ding-dong and cut the bloody dentist hunting short, i've decided to let Dr.Wong do my surgery.

If you're wondering why i'm being so bloody fussy with my dentist, it's because:
  1. The surgery requires removal of SOME jaw bone that is burying half the tooth. Due to age factor (bloody hell) my bones are harder in comparison to kids and teens, so complications might occur.
  2. There are risks of nerve damage during the surgery. Depending on nerves, temporary to long term numbness can occur to the chin, lip or tongue.
  3. Infection, swelling and post-op pain will be common. But can be controlled with drugs.

SighhHHHhhhh... why oh why...

Not only will i be RM1200 poorer, i might suffer from a sagging face and a dangling dead tongue!!! What's there to life if i can't taste butter crab anymore????? *GASSSSPPPPPP* Ok, ok... calmness needed, please tell me i'm thinking too much! >_<"

Okayyyy, going off the topic... I ran out of my favourite Elianto liquid eye liner and went back to get somemore. Apparently, they have discontinued the one i was using!!!

Why do they always discontinue the stuff i like?!! Even my dentist ran away!!! *@&#^!$!&@

Okay, whatever... i asked the sales girl to recommend me something better if not as good as the one i was using. And she quickly recommended this to me.

"Waterproof, no smudge liquid liner", she beamed.

I thought... yeah, just what i needed cause my students make me cry alot! *heh* So i got it and used it yesterday and my verdict of this product...

PLEASE DON'T BUY IT
unless you're some kinda synchronize swimmer who needs some SERIOUS waterproof makeup!!!




My eyelids almost came off while i was attempting to remove the liner! Even makeup remover for permanent makeups didn't work! I had to RUB so hard to get it all off from my lids, the task was so damn petrifying i tell you! Even my liquid liner hates me!!! *Sooobbbbb, throws the liner and runs away*

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Random Love

I'm SO feelin' the vintage trend, now who wants to play dress up with me?
;)

http://ssimstyle.com/


http://www.refinery29.com/




Saturday, September 20, 2008

Say Cheese

So... i finally had that long-awaited-for x-ray to see those troublesome wisdom. And i tell you, it's no good news nor overly terrible news, but i am quite sure that i won't be going back for the surgery (will explain later) Meanwhile, let me show you the cause of my distress.

My right 'sleeping' wisdom.

This is the one which gave me the most discomfort lately. But doc says it doesn't look that bad over the x-ray because there are not much signs of intense pressure to the neighbouring molar. Good news is, there are no cavity (yet). Bad news is, the wisdom tooth is deeply lodged in the jaw bone and extraction will include cutting open the gums, some parts of bone and dissect the tooth into sections before removing in parts. *GULP*



Moving on...
My other 'sleeping' left wisdom tooth

Oh, i don't even know where to begin describing the amount of torture this one has given me over the years. Doc says this one is has more bad news than good. If you look closely, you can actually see the impact has caused signs of cavity to the molar beside it. Then the doc quickly took out another patients x-ray (with similar prob) to show/comfort me. I can only go 'OMG' whilst looking at it. Half of the dude's molar was eaten away and the doc says that dude is gonna say tata to all 4 tooth. Tsk, tsk, tsk... if he's a hamster, habis edi...

Anyways, the other concern the doc had was the gap below the wisdom, which explains why i get more food trap in the left than the right side. Doc also believes that my diligent flossing actually delayed the cavity and decay. So people reading this; FLOSS, FLOSS, FLOSS!!! And GARGLE, GARGLE, GARGLE!!! (Doc recommends Listerine!)

Procedure of surgery, the same as above. He then proceeds to the 'airing' procedure to test the level of sensitivity and damage they have caused. My left side was surprisingly less sensitive compared to the right. The right side felt as though i am biting on to ice when the airing apparatus blew into it. It's like brain freeze from your gums to your brain - imagine that! *shudder*

Okay, now the reason(s) why i won't go back for the surgery:
  1. Cost Issue: Each tooth is gonna cost me RM800-1k (even more $$$ than the first dentist i went to!!!)
  2. Hygiene Issue: The clinic may have all the facilities but the doc doesn't seem to practice proper hygiene on the patients. He didn't let me put on any disposable bib while he was doing the airing and stuff, so water was spraying all over me while he was 'airing' my teeth! Geeezzeeeee...
  3. Nurse Issue: The nurse is also a front desk, x-ray operator and cashier. And she has zero charisma and enthusiasm at servicing the patients (maybe because she's too freggin' busy with her multitasking job!)
  4. Trust Issue: The doc is really nice and all. He explained ALL the possible surgical options i can go for; general anesthesia or local anesthesia, the pro's and con's plus possible risks. BUT, i just don't have the same faith i have for the doc i went to a couple of months ago. Maybe it's the way he explains things to me (too much unnecessary info!), and he doesn't seem to be as confident as the other doc. And since i already got my x-ray now, i might just go back to the RM700 option. *big fat sigh*

Okay, running off the topic now...
Have you caught on to the yearbook fever yet?
*Evil grin* Nyek, nyek, nyek...

*jaw dropping surprises coming soon!*

Friday, September 19, 2008

Excuses


  • I was a little depressed
  • They were on 50% SALES
  • I haven't shopped in yonks
  • My feet grew (fatter) so i need new shoes
  • I was depressed... oh, i said that already
  • My tanned legs don't go with my old shoes
  • They were really comfy... comfy, fab and cheap shoes hardly come by

So did they bring me cheer? Well... any good buy can and will bring me cheer, but my aching b****y wisdom tooth (two of 'em) are driving me nuts. I can hardly chew on both ends, and flossing feels like sawing down my gums *sob* I'm shameful to even admit to the fact that i actually endured this on and off pain for almost a decade... yes, since my college years! I had to put off the surgery because dental fees at Australia is day light robbery, after that, i secured a job and cannot afford to take any sick leave but most of all, i am terrified of dentists!!! The needles in the gums!!! Screams of horror!!! *sobbbb*

SO, they are still laying there, side ways, neither fully in nor out and giving me a lot of pain! The last i've consulted in a dentist, the surgery for ONE freggin tooth will cost me RM700 *Laughs hysterically* I can buy 100 over pair of shoes during sales with that money! So i'm seeking 2nd opinion which will hopefully cost me less blood *literally*!!! Wish me luck!!!

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Shoeperstitious

Exactly one year ago on this date, i met a car accident while on my way to work, stained my purse and pants with leaking ink from my pen and stepped on melting gum.

That very fateful day, i was wearing a nice pair of black Vincci peep-toe-Louboutin-wannabe and ever since, it has never seen the light of day (or the moon and stars either). Yes, i actually believed that i was so darn unlucky that day all because i wore the wrong shoes. I know it could have been the shirt, or bag or whatever... but it has to be the shoes for me.

So, I'm typing this one year later because i want a closure and I 'think' i am ready to give it another chance (or not). I will only know later... *gulp*

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Fascinate me

while i divert some unimportant thoughts & feelings.

Remember those pheasant feathers i bought from Singapore? Well, i'm so gonna pimp it into one of those hair band fascinators below! More lovelies at Etsy.







If only i said 'Decaf'

Yay! 2.38am and i am wide awake. No thanks to some instant 3-in-1 Ipoh White coffee i had so much earlier, and you can bet your last penny that it will be my first and last!

So, all alone at home, awake with nothing to do. I started thinking about a 'shoulder-to-cry-on' conversation i had with my cousin, a friend's troubled confession, and that 'thing' i'm still trying to deal with *let's out a tiny yawn + sigh* The crap coffee puts you through at night...

Sunday, September 07, 2008

Wheee!!! Shoesssss!!!!!

For some reason, hubba and i was at Petaling Street today, shopping! And i got these beauties for the greatest price! Puma for RM40!!! And they don't look or feel like fakes at all! AHHHhhHHhhh.... i love 'em, love 'em, love 'em!!!

Friday, September 05, 2008

Mission KK, Journey Recap

I know i came back to this a little late... The moment i stepped off the plane, i came home, and i also came back to the worldly matters that took me away again.

But I shall prevail this moment of reflection.






Many told me; Overcome this journey, you'll overcome everything in life.

I didn't believe it, but i find myself taking it back.

To begin with, it wasn't so much about the physical challenge. It was the mental one that has brought a whole new meaning to endurance. Though it was a journey i boarded with 5 other people along with hundreds of other perfect strangers, i never felt more 'alone' and at peace. I know many have prayed and wished the best for me because i felt an unusual burst of determination and strength throughout the journey. I thank you all from the bottom of my heart for that :) I truly felt blessed.

I may have conquered the highest peak of southeast Asia, but i think the ultimate victory was letting go and letting God, separating my heart desires and letting Him move and fill in me.


2nd Update: No Turning Back

Having chosen Mesilau trail instead of Timpohon also meant we have chosen to go through 2 extra km of rocky trails. But the view was worth every sweat an muscle spasm!

The 1st kilometer was the hardest because we started by going up hill on steps all the way! After approximately 500 meters, i could no longer catch up with the 3 person ahead of me and i had to stop to catch my breath and stop my heart from leaping out off my mouth! I even felt a little throbbing on the head, one of the unwelcoming signs of ltitude sickness. But thanks to mom, she packed me the almighty Siamese medicated oil; "fung yau" and it became my ultimate energizer throughout the hike!





Throughout the journey, i had a lot going through my head. I thought about the journey of my life thus far, the people, some incidents and a possible future. At some path, i made some decisions to forgive and to forget. I dealt with my inner ghosts, and overcome some fears and self doubts. I studied the people who shared similar dreams and mission, even people who treated the challenging trails as a walk in the park.